Tuesday, November 23, 2010


I reside in the great ol' land of MinneSNOWta... one of the most pleasant states in the country to vacation (except... minus the Twin Cities/Duluth/Boundary Waters... not so much!). I had the pleasure to spend the last three days in my nice warm house, under my nice warm covers, while my nice warm body (well, actually that part wasn't so nice) kept me shivering for multiple days. With my mystery illness in its last legs, I finally decided today would be an excellent day to get my butt out of my bedroom and start moving around.

So I hop online for a bit and start working on a paper (that wasn't due yesterday... nope!), chat with the dear boyfriend for a bit, and start figuring out my day. I knew that day I'd have to make the drive (I'm cat-sitting for my friend/voice teacher for the holidays) across town to feed and brush the cat. Read about the upcoming ice fiasco that's supposed to start tomorrow, got lectured by dad to be careful going to my appointment in icy conditions, sip coffee and munch on cereal. I finally finish my paper around 4:30pm, so I figure it's a great time to trek on out to the other side of town in my lovely Pilot.

I grab my Minnetonka Moccasins, my Aeropostle sweatshirt, and a pair of ratty jeans. I see the garbage was taken out today, so I figure I will grab the mail and the garbage/recycle cans before I hop in the car.


Somebody forgot to mention to me that it was barely only the in the mid 20s today. I quickly grab my Ugg boots, a coat, gloves, and a hat before I leave the house. Felt much better soon after.

It is amazing how quickly winter seems to come in Minnesota. It seems like it was only a month ago that we were enjoying highs in the 50s and 60s; in fact, we had an unusually warm March-Oct of 2010. The first day it was in the 40s last month, I knew I was in trouble! I decided to keep a coat in the car (just in case, ya know) and tough it out in mainly a sweatshirt to adjust a bit better. But in the three days I was confined indoors, it seems the atmosphere has changed a lot.

It's sad that we don't even enjoy a full 12 hours of sun, it's sad that it's going to get much colder before it gets warmer, it's sad that soon there will be ice and snow everywhere for extended periods of time, it's sad it will take 10 minutes for my car to run before I feel even an ounce of warmth driving home...

I cannot even begin to fathom why people enjoy living up north (to those of you in Canada or Alaska- kudos to you!). I joke with my friends the Minnesota seasons are: Winter, Winter, STILL Winter, and Road Construction. When it's not snowing and freezing cold, we have tornadoes, floods, wildfires, droughts, and nasty wind. During the winter the ditches are plagued with cars and drivers wondering 'wtf just happened, mate?'. Nobody wants to spend more than 10 seconds outdoors unless doing something fun or useful.

But then, I suppose most of us complain about our locations. I know friends down south who would love some snow and cold. I know friends up north who think we have it easy. And in the end, I still live here nonetheless. So I decided to come up with a list of why I love Minnesota.

In the winter- snuggles with hot chocolate (and marshmellows) by the campfire, skiing, throwing snowballs at your friends, watching people fall on their butts in the ice and laughing, ice skating, the enjoyment of driving to a destination without dying, the first snowfall, the way the Christmas lights sparkle in the glow of the freshly fallen snow

In the spring: Watching all the buds on the trees turn to full blown leaves, the sheer smell of spring, the final snow melting away as messy wetness, lilacs, watching everything turn to green almost instantly, the days growing longer, the first 60 degree day, the first over 32 degree night

In the summer: watching the peace settle over the sunset, the unpredictable weather, the beautiful storms, driving down the road with the windows down and the breeze to cool you, ice creams at the outdoor Dairy Queen, swatting the mosquitoes before they bite the living crap out of you, biking down the trails, playing outside with bare feet, flip flop tans, getting to wear shorts

In the fall: the brilliance of the reds in the changing trees, lingering last walks in the evening before it turns too cold, the first snowdrops flittering from the sky, the crisp color of blue on a sunny day, stomping through the leaves on the sidewalk

Hard to believe that I love you, Minnesota.

Saturday, November 20, 2010

Strained Relationships (with flu on the side)

My last post is about being sick... and a few days later, I'm sick again! Aren't I just so lucky! I went to bed yesterday with a sore throat, and 24 hours later I have a fever, bad headache, chills... apparently I can't seem to catch a break. I'm hoping some more rest will do me well. I apologize if any of what I say sounds feverishly delirious, for I know not what I'm saying.

I am part of another really awesome forum about Myers Briggs (which I still have to do a post about) called Personality Cafe. I wrote a long rant/question/frustration about how my dad and I fight constantly and posted it. My dad and I are polar opposites when it comes to personality. Here is an example of what I wrote:

"... The housework issue is just god awful. I've gotten better about keeping most of the house clean, but with my bedroom/bathroom I really don't care. It is nothing against him whatsoever, but for me to clean is just not my nature. I don't think about putting something away after I've used it. I toss my clothes on the floor. My junk litters the bathroom counter. Keep in mind, we do not share a bathroom. So, unpredictable him says nothing half the time, and the other half he has these temper tantrums. He screams at me and orders to listen to his barking. He says if I don't clean or do xyz, he'll throw away my stuff. If I go into my room and lock my door, he screams loud and threatens me. He thinks everything I do (or don't do) is to piss him off. He thinks I don't clean my room to purposely piss him off. I just don't think about it!

I also feels like he values his 'stuff' more than me. If I break something or something gets messed up in the house and I can't provide a logical explanation of how it exactly happened, I get yelled at. For example, the sprayer on the sink got stuck one morning while I was making coffee. While trying to unstick it, it popped off. No big deal. I immediately called him and let him know so he wouldn't come home to a broken sink. He says it's fine. That night, he gets on my case about how it 'really' broke. He said he was sick of my friends messing around with his shit and breaking everything. Um, I was the one who caused it to pop off. I am not aware of doing anything unusual to the sprayer..."

Pardon the language, I was really frustrated when I posted part of this message. I know not all of you agree with your parents, in fact, I'm sure some of you have strained relationships with them. When they have too high of expectations, or try to control you, how do you handle it?

My experiment, in the mean time, is to read the books Safe People and Codependent No More (was suggested to me by another member, luckily I already had both of those books). Once I'm better, I will do a review on the books and tell you how reading them affected my relationship with my dad.

If you want to read the whole post, check it out right here!!!!

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

My darn luck!

So, I thought you'd get a laugh out of something... weird, amusing, funny... that happened today.

I finished my blog post this morning after hopping out of the shower. I was actually feeling fairly productive, for I woke up at 9am and had to be at work by 11. A shower, breakfast, and a blog post in an hour and 45 minutes [15 minute drive to work].

So, today was day 3 in the jewelry section. I've been at my store now for about three months. I normally work in juniors/special sizes but they asked me to take a holiday position in the fine jewelry area. So I started a week ago from Sunday. It was actually very interesting learning about the different types of metals and stones... and fascinating to see how people can pay more than $2500 for a tiny piece of jewelry.

[If I had $2500, this is what I would rather spend it on: rent to move out of the house, a new laptop, savings for a car, savings for my road trip next April]

I had five days off between my next shift, which honestly felt like pure torture. On the plus side, it helped me get back to writing on here! I went in for shift number 2 on Saturday, this time with more people to help guide me. After a few hours, I noticed I was getting some splotchy, itchy red spots on my fingers and hands. They were uncomfortable and felt a bit raw, but I thought nothing of it.

So, I had a few days to forget about the incident when I go in this morning for shift number 3. After about 15 minutes I began to break out again. One of the ladies who saw me break out Saturday got concerned, so I decided to test the allergy. I took an earring and held it to my left wrist. Within about 60 seconds I broke out again.

It didn't take long before things just got worse. I immediately started feeling bad, extremely dizzy, nauseous, cold, shaky... my coworker called a manager. She got to me immediately and said we had to go to HR to fill an incident report. Now, my store is two levels. We went on the escalator and about halfway up I immediately get very dizzy and nauseous. I nearly pass out! I actually had to sit down for a bit before I could finish getting to the office.

We file the report, I have to call the Macy's nurseline, and the manager's determine that I cannot work in fine jewelry. So, I will find out tomorrow where I will end up for the holidays.

I was hoping I could keep working, but I was feeling pretty nasty after lying down in the employee lounge couch for an hour. I decided to go home.

I've been feeling on and off bad for the remainder of the day. I've seen my temp get as high as about 100, but mostly hovering in the high 98's. I'm wondering if I've got a bug on top of the reaction, or if this is reaction related. Anybody have any ideas? Mainly it's just a headache and stomachache.

So I finished school and now I'm just chilling. Lots to figure out in the next few weeks!

Have a terrific night!

Stepping Out of the Comfort Zone

I will warn you, I may not be writing as much over the next month or so. Retail is absolutely insane during the holidays. I also doubled up on my classes, so I have twice as much schoolwork (on average, I do one paper or project a week- sometimes more!). So I plan on writing, but maybe not as frequently as I'd prefer. Break starts December 20. I look forward to having two weeks off (with my school schedule, the only break they offer is two weeks in Christmas. Otherwise I'm going all year unless I request a week off). Pray with me that I can get a good schedule going and that I don't feel too overwhelmed.

I have to admit, I'm pretty pleased with the reactions to my last post. I have learned that if you don't judge others, they tend not to judge you.

Jesus says you should love your enemies, but unfortunately you still aren't going to like everybody that comes your way. Some people are overbearing, talk incessantly about topics that bore you to death, they stalk you, etc... God has presented me with an interesting challenge. The last few months I have been settling in a nice comfort zone, but God often wants you to get out of your comfort zone and do things for Him.

Last night, the challenge arose.

I mentioned I am part of a recovery group Monday nights (I also do bible studies that night as well). I get there at 4:30pm to do a practice for worship band, then 5pm is my study. 6pm we have a group dinner, and 7pm we have a large group where the worship band performs. I came down with a nasty headache last night right before supper. I assume it came from the little amounts of sleep from the nights before, and sleeping funny also put a lot of extra tension on my neck. Practice had gone well, but when I get my headaches one of the problems I face when singing is that all the instrumentals/vocals around me get separated and I don't perform as well. I got up on stage and I already felt a little stressed because of this.

Right as we started the first song, I looked out into the audience. And I saw him.

I have known him for many years. In fact, I was probably about five or six when I met him. It was in a kid's group at my aunt's church. There were a variety of kids in the group and he was in it. He is a few years older than me. I remember not liking him very much, for I thought he was a bit abrasive. He was nice enough, it wasn't like he was pushing me around or barking orders at me, but I just didn't know how to handle him. It wasn't too long before I was in foster care and that church became history.

God definitely seems to have a plan. He popped up in my life again the summer before ninth grade. My parents placed me in a summer volunteer group called Summer of Service (better known in my area as SOS). The kids in group varied from six grade through tenth, and every weekday for two weeks we went out in the community and did volunteer work. He was in my group. I remember he was very annoying. He was in tenth grade and he had a crush on one of the seventh grade girls. He would pester her incessantly and the rest of the group (including me) took a severe disliking to his antics. He would take popular songs on the radio and make up these really bizarre lyrics (to the point where it actually ruined a number of songs I had really liked). He was also very overweight, so he got picked on a lot by some of the boys. Once again, the two weeks came and went, and he was out of my life.

His name popped up every now and then in conversation, for he knew my birth family in the area and apparently would mention me to them. Said family would repeat messages for me. This didn't happen very often, but I just ignored them. I really didn't care.

Ok, I have to cut out of the story for a bit of a precursor. I decided about a month ago I really would like to be a leader in the recovery group. A lot of my recovery took place outside of the group so I am catching up on a lot of the principles. I figure this is a good idea because of two reasons: One, if I struggle again, I have additional principles to work with. Two, that way I am familiarized enough with the program so I can be an efficient leader. A lot of the people who attend the support group have chemical dependency, an issue I never really faced. If I become a leader, I intend to help those with codependency, depression, and anxiety. If I am to be a leader, I have to get to know everybody and treat everybody in the group with love and respect.

Cue back to story. A few days ago, I noticed his name on one of my friend's Facebook page (one from recovery group, actually). I glanced at his page, and then went on.

There had to be a reason for that, apparently...

So here I am, on stage with a nasty headache. Anxious because I know my performance will suck. And I see him. I am TOTALLY not prepared for that. When I get headaches, sometimes I do not act as rationally as I would prefer too. I pretty much avoided his gaze (he was looking right at me) and just tried to perform decently. After the first set, I ran back into the sound booth where my boyfriend was. I told him my headache was too bad so I decided to go back to his house and rest for a bit. I told him briefly I ran into somebody I wasn't fond with and that it upset me, but I didn't go into details.

This whole issue is on my mind now. I want to be a good leader, and I realize that as a leader I have to put my frustrations with others aside. I need to promote love and support to everybody, no matter what I do. I can't 'ignore' him or 'avoid' him like I would prefer to do. I have been praying about it.

I can't guarantee he will be back again, as I said, this is the first time I've ever seen him at group. He may have just come to see what the group is. He may never show up again. The thing is, I really need to sit down and think about how I can be a good leader. I can't let prejudice get in my way. I hope to find some bible verses to help me overcome this hurdle.

So, I need some advice. What do I do? [yes, that is a heavy question]. I really don't know. I have a high annoyance tolerance [for Pete's sake, I can be outrageously annoying too. But I try to control it and be serious most of the time]. But when somebody gets under my skin, it really gets to me. How can I get out of my comfort zone and handle anybody like this in a good manner?

Curly-Haired Confession #4- You aren't going to like everybody you meet. However, you should still be considerate and respectful. If they talk to you, listen and offer support. If they do something that interferes with your value system, you need to inform them nicely and do not get involved. Annoyance and harassment are two different issues. If they just annoy you, find a way to deal with it.

Have a nice Tuesday, everybody! :)

Oh and a shout out to the bf: Happy seven month anniversary! I love you lots!!!!

Sunday, November 14, 2010


I'm such a procrastinator :P I should totally be working on school but I'm more in a writing in my blog mood over a writing a paper on my nutritional outtake or writing answers to my lifespan development worksheet mood. For some reason though, I don't think you mind (I certainly don't!).

As you see, I'm a member of 20sb [aka 20-something-bloggers] (it's a fun little community!) and you should check them out here. They cover a variety of topics that any 20-something has on their mind or deals with in life, in a forum setting of course! Some of the topics are kinda light and fun, while others are more serious.

I'll actually have to write a review at some point, but a few of the topics on there have been floating around my brain.

One of the guys [prefer not to provide names] writes very thought provoking forum posts, especially related to hate, judging, etc. The most recent post I replied was titled 'My religion is better than your religion.'

Ooooh, this one I have a lot of thoughts on!

What baffles me BEYOND belief is how so many denominations of Christianity insist they way they do things is right, and how others, well, do not. Um, what? God Almighty and Jesus Christ are the only ones who do things right. As for everything else, humans interpret the bible and/or other religious factors differently from everybody else. Humans are not perfect, nor do we know everything. [We like to think we do, however].

I can't provide you all the answers about Christianity, but I would just like to give you something to think about. Who are we to judge one another? Who are we to judge another's denomination? Who are we to judge our own? He will judge us when the time comes, and only His judgments are correct. I am not saying that what everybody does is correct, for the law does specifically tell us what we should and should not be doing. I gratefully accept Christian assistance, especially if I am straying from the truth. And a true Christian cannot be idle either; I am called to spread His word and His love to those who stray and those who do not believe. My goal is to do what His law expects of me.

We all sin on a consistent basis. We all know His laws, to an excruciating amount. The bible is full of them. The more we learn how many we must follow, the more we realize we aren't! "For no one can ever be made right in God's sight by doing what his law commands. For the more we know God's law, the clearer it becomes that we aren't obeying it." Romans 3:20. Jesus Christ has freed us from our sins by dying on the cross for us, and we should be eternally grateful.

I have no right to judge you for what you are, or are not doing. I am not perfect. I sin on a regular basis, and I wholeheartedly admit that. Because Jesus died for my sins, I do not consider this as a pass for my sin to be acceptable by any means. I am accountable for my own actions in the very end.

Therefore my challenge for you is when somebody says something that you blatantly think is wrong, re-evaluate. "And why worry about a speck in your friend's eye when you have a log in your own? How can you think of saying, 'Let me help you get rid of that speck in your eye, when you can't see past the log in your own eye? Hypocrite! First get rid of the log from your own eye; then perhaps you will see well enough to deal with the speck in your friend's eye." Matthew 7:3-5. Change what you are doing wrong before you help another change their transgressions.

Curly-Haired Confession #3: I am NOT perfect. I sin on a daily basis, no matter how much I love Him and His law. My life is bound by sin. Before I focus on what other people are doing wrong, I need to fix my own wrongdoings.

The story of the adulterous woman in John 8 always comes to mind. Not necessarily about the woman, but the something that Jesus said we should apply before we condemn others.

"Let those who have never sinned cast the first stone." Matthew 8:(part of verse)7.

Dear Jesus, I am a sinner. I am ashamed of those things I do on a regular basis that go against what you expect of me. I humbly repent and you know my heart, that I would rather do anything before sinning against You and Your Word. I know other people sin, but I have no right to say I am better than they are. Give me the strength to help guide them to You instead of judging or gloating, and also to guide me into fixing my own transgressions. In Your name, Amen.

Friday, November 12, 2010


When I was younger, I always felt out of place with most of the people around me. Especially with those in my own age group. I had a few select friends who teased me because, while easy to read, I was hard to understand. Most of my friends were older or younger than I was, and for the most part I was perfectly fine with that.

I was in the car the other day with my boyfriend. I was feeling mildly upset because a friend of his invited him to go out of town to visit for some sort of event. I wasn't upset because I was worried he would do something that would upset me. I was upset because I can probably count on one hand the number of times somebody invited me (specifically me, that is) to an event. I opened up to him slowly, because I didn't want him to think I was upset at him (I wasn't).

I started rambling (because my thoughts are never organized... generally as I ramble I stumble upon whatever bothers me) to him that when we would go out to places, people would always show interest in talking to him. I told him that people might say hello to me, but that was generally the extent of conversation. It was brought up that generally when he spoke to other people, it was about what he was doing (he defines himself by what he does), generally about cars or work. What I am most passionate about is people. Sadly, most people don't find talking about personality and psychological theories for multiple hours interesting enough.

I realized that for the most part, I don't think like most people. ESPECIALLY people in my age group. The guys talk about partying, football, and what they find attractive in women (generally pretty shallow). The girls talk about fashion, mind-numbing TV shows, partying, and other things I find a bit on the shallow, boring side. Most of what they say, do, and think is influenced by their friends or the media. I don't do that. I do what I like.

Now, I'm not saying what most girls do is bad. I just can't relate to them. Same with guys, too. I have always found comfort in those who stray farthest from the norm. This is one of the reasons I love my boyfriend: he isn't like most guys, especially in our age group. He has his own interests and does not allow anybody else to control his likes or dislikes. Plus he is very passionate about his hobbies. For the most part, we think on the same page (with minor differences here and there).

I just have to remember I can't be bothered by the fact I am different. I love being different! I just wish I was an introvert because then I would be ok about doing things on my own most of the time. I'm an extravert, so I thrive around people. It just doesn't quite 'match' with my eccentric personality. For now, I just need to reach out to others and be a good friend to all. Just need a little more practice!

Curly-Haired Confession #2: Never be ashamed of who you are. God made you to be special in his eyes.

(Me and my uniqueness... I dressed up as Perry the Platypus for Halloween!)

Thursday, November 11, 2010

Curly-Haired Confession #1

Since you last heard from me (in July)....

-I got a new job
-I got my ham radio license (KD0MOE!)
-I joined a gym
-I've lost six pounds and four percent body fat
-I've joined (TWO) worship band
-I started a bible study
-I got my first drum lesson
-I gained a new obsession
-I successfully painted my toenails for the first time
-I watched my best friend from high school get married
-I got my first AA on expert mode in DDR
-I doubled up on my classes for school
-I began the process of grad school hunting
-I'm planning a fundraiser
-I have more friends

In the last four months or so, there have been a number of changes. Maybe it is because I have been going to college at home, or because the last few years of my life have not followed the 'norm' of my age group... but I am beginning to realize that my life is in a period of great change (as is anybody my age).

As I continue to lift out of my depression, I also am more capable of holding my own and initiating my own agenda. It scares me to even wonder about where I will be next November, because I know it will not be where I am now. But the coolest part is feeling confident that in the long run, I will end up ok. I know there are plenty of people in the world who love me and support me. I know I can make smart, rational decisions and be a good adult.

Curly-Haired Confession #1: Change is inevitable, no matter what.

Therefore, I will embrace my changes head on. It may never be graceful, and it may never be pretty, but I'm not going to hide in fear that the worst will always happen. Change may bring the bad, but it certainly brings out the good, too. I will support others when they need guidance during change. I will seek help when change overwhelms me. I will remember that I can get through anything. I have gotten through a lot already, and because I did that, nothing can hold me back now.

Friday, November 5, 2010

Make a Difference

In the last few months, I have thought LONG and HARD about the kind of person I aspire to be. I try to think… what am I good at? What defines me? What can I use to benefit other people?

I began a bit of a list… I am good with music, singing, writing, being a people-person, selling items, having LOTS of energy, reading, DDR, and being myself. Alright, so I have a random list of things I’m good at. So where does that bring me? Must think more!!!!

And then, it hit me! I figure if that last question is important to the type of person I want to be, I want to help others. I want to use my God-given talents to benefit other people, in any way possible. I talked to some friends for a while about what sort of things I could do to make a difference for others.

Finding a cause to work with was a bit difficult, because there are SO many problems in the world. It is nearly impossible to work for every single one. I wish at one point to be a Christian motivational speaker for teenagers, but I have a lot to figure out before I can start. I will call that a ‘long-term goal’. However, one problem that is dear to my heart is Mitochondrial Disease. I follow a few blogs about families who have a member (generally a young child) that suffers from the disease. If you do some research, it is absolutely heartbreaking. In very young children, it is often fatal. There is no cure.

I found UMDF soon after, which is the United Mitochondrial Disease Foundation. They have an option to donate, but I don’t really have a lot of money to spare because I only work part time. Trying to save on top of my bills is a bit tricky, but it’s important. There was a link there regarding hosting a fundraiser, so I looked through the different ideas for fundraising activities. Because of my love for DDR (Dance Dance Revolution), I thought hosting a video game tournament would be really awesome. I got a lot of friends to support the idea and actually add a few other things that would make for a successful fundraiser.

So my hope is to get a Mitochondrial Disease Research fundraiser going in my area. There are still a ton of details to work out, but I submitted a form to UMDF and had a representative contact me. I am waiting for a chance to get to speak with her over the phone. I want these kids to have a cure someday so they don’t have to suffer. I will update you on how the process is going!

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Update :)

Wow, I let life get in the way and nearly four months pass without writing a single thing. I did warn you that I’m not terribly good with continually writing. I’m getting a bit better with keeping a consistent schedule, including (trying) to get up at 8am and actually make my day somewhat productive. That isn’t always easy. Now if I can master a consistent bedtime (or at least before midnight, regardless of the time!)… It’s a work in progress.

I actually haven’t stopped writing completely, but I keep a personal journal now. I figure now that I have a place to store my most personal and (extremely) detailed information, maybe I will feel less compelled to write about it here. I know I felt a struggle with my writing, because after a point in time, it just felt so superficial. I hope you can be patient with me as I try to figure out who I am and what I am passionate about within my writings.

I have done a lot of moving forward with my life, so that is good at least. I finally got fed up with my poor hours at my previous job and went job hunting in August. I was VERY fortunate and accepted a position within a few weeks. I was able to quit both the jobs I held over the summer due to the hours I picked up at my new job. I work at a national retail (mainly clothing) chain that specializes, as my manager put it, in ‘affordable’ luxury items. They care a lot more about pleasing the customer and making sure the employees are happy. I finally don’t have to worry about catty coworkers, incompetent managers, and a poor work environment. I have made friends…. GIRL friends… MY AGE!!!!!!! It is so nice to have girls to text and chat with at work! My managers are impressed with my performance and their kind words really help me thrive. In fact, after only being there a couple of months, I accepted a holiday position working in the fine jewelry department. I know they only ask a few employees to take the position, so I feel honored that they asked me. Currently I work in juniors and special sizes (petites, plus sizes). I will be going back to the department again after the holidays. Also- the incentives ROCK! The managers reward you greatly for doing a good job. Makes working so fun!

I can’t remember the exact dates, but right around the time of my last post I joined a Christian Recovery group. I am now participating in a bible study of sorts; using the Bible, prayer, and reflection to help me deal with my hurts, habits, and hang-ups. I am the background vocalist for the band at the large group session of the meeting. I also am now a background vocalist for the main church as well, performing 1-2 times a month. I have a strong passion to sing harmony, and it is really fun to get to experiment with chords playing against the melody. Most of my ‘work’ is impromptu- basically I learn the songs in practice, make up harmony, and master what I make up. It is a LOT of fun!

Boyfriend and I are still together; we just celebrated our six month anniversary in the middle of October. He has been a wonderful support and I am so appreciative to have him in my life. I was making progress before he came along, however his friendship has been a very strong influence to help me continue making good decisions. His family has welcomed me in like one of their own, which is really nice because I have not had much of a ‘normal’ family setting growing up.

Because of all my progress, I am happy (maybe a little sad, too) to announce that my therapy is coming to a close in December. It has been once a month since about July, but I continue to do well and deal with my emotional problems with strength, grace, and maturity (well, at least more than before…). I have been taken off my meds and I’m still staying strong! Life certainly isn’t easy by any means, but I have a lot more to work with when I am feeling down.

I’m feeling a lot more fit too! In August, I decided that I was starting to weigh a bit too much and that I needed to start working out on a more consistent basis and eat better. I joined a gym in my town that is fairly inexpensive and starting going a bit more frequently. I also purchased Dance Dance Revolution, the amazing work-out video game experience that I believe helped me drop nearly 40 pounds in my senior year of high school. I have only lost about three pounds overall since August, but I’ve lost a number of inches off various parts of my body and feel great! I still have a bit more work to do, but it’s nice to feel better about my body!

School is also a bit better. I am finally back to getting A’s and am hoping to double up on my classes starting next week. It would be nice to graduate by summer so I can get started with my ‘adult’ life (which includes MORE school!!!).

Anyways, so there’s the update. I will write again soon about something REALLY awesome that I’m planning. And other things, too :).

Monday, November 1, 2010


Intend to write tomorrow! I am alive and well. Lots have been happening since I last wrote and I need to get back into this... However it is 1am, I am EXHAUSTED, and I have work tomorrow (Oh, I have a new job too! :D). Have a good night!!!